Liebarry Internetz Safe as Houses #liebarrywinning

A public library in Hernando, MS busted local preacher Eddie Prince after he allegedly looked at child pornography on the library's computers after bypassing the library's filters.  Patrons and staff noticed what the man was viewing and straight cold busted him.

Not exactly, but whatev's

I really have nothing to say about this.  How the hell do I make this funny?  Or funnier, depending on your viewpoint.  Here's one way, brought to you by WREG News in Memphis.  I can only assume that WREG felt the library might be at fault with the preacher getting past their Internet filters, so they asked what I can only assume is a random local about her kids and the library.  Here is what she had to say, "If I was gonna send 'em someplace to use the computer, it would be here because of the security because I know they can't access anything they're not supposed to, like trash."  There you have it.  Rather than send her children to McDonald's or a strip club or a strange preacher's house to use the Internet, she would rather send her children to the library.  That's what I call #liebarrywinning

WREG via LISNews

Smithsonian Adds More Robots, Zombies Next?

Not actual representation

The Smithsonian Institution of American History added a few more robots to its collection this week. Among the additions was MARV (Mini Autonomous Robotic Vehicle), one of the smallest robots in the world.  MARV joins other such classic robot conceptions as R2D2 and C3P0 also on display in the museum. 

Aw, ain't the tiny robot cute as it putts around?  Yeah, then it whips out a knife and starts cutting fools.  I saw Transmorphers, I know what's up.  The Smithsonian should be destroying these abominations, not putting them in one place so they can talk to each other.  What fools these mortals be! 

Next thing you know a government agency will be collecting virus's of extinct plagues...  What the hell do you mean they do that?!  We gotta talk to these crazy government people, man.  That's messed up.

Computer World

Library of Congress Goes Country

The Library of Congress is immortalizing Tammy Wynette's song "Stand By Your Man," "Take Me Out to the Ballgame," and Al Green's "Let's Stay Together" in the National Recording Registry this week.  A controversial choice as it is seen by many as a sexist song, the song will now accompany other such great recordings as Abbot and Costello's "Who's on first?" routine and Nirvana's "Nevermind" album.

I think the LoC is attempting to make the single weirdest iTunes playlist of all time.  You got you some country, some rock, some spoken word, a crowd favorite, and finally, some music to get freaky to.  Now that sounds like a Friday night down at the local roadhouse.

The Atlantic

E is for Easy Books

"Easy books" are defined by ABC-CLIO as

A heavily illustrated book with limited text written to appeal to the interests and reading ability of children from preschool to third grade, usually shelved in a separate section of a school library or children's room in a public library. Synonymous with easy reader.

The pellet food for the young child, easy books are easily the most loved by patrons and hated by some professionals.  Cute and cuddly with little by way of actual reading, these books give glimpses into our pasts when we quietly read the adventures of Curious George and the Berenstein Bears while our babysitters shot tequila and organized fight clubs in the basement.  These books are about creating the gift of reading for children and reliving those memories as adults.  In essence easy books are like doorknobs; everyone gets a turn.

Professionally, these books can be quite a nightmare.  Thank goodness they are cheap because they are often destroyed beyond recognition.  Because of their size they cannot often be shelved in the regular matter and are often organized into "bins" that act like little interment camps for refugees.  These bins get more action than the entire Vietnam War.  I have heard grown librarians cry when a swath of easy books show up on a holds (patron request) list and they realize they will spend more than an hour hunched over in back-clenching pain searching for those damnedable books.

But we love them all.  They keep the kids quiet and coming back for more, the true point of a children's department.  Just do not expect to find me down there too often.  I have a bad back.

D is for Damage

When books sing the blues.

We all know the scenario.  A teary-eyed youngin comes up to the circulation desk.  You lean over and ask what's wrong.  He refuses to meet your eyes, but produces a lump of pulp that was once a copy of Harry Potter.  You take it from him, look at the stains of chocolate, the dog bite marks, the damage of a water puddle, other unsightly scrapes that you cannot identify.  Then you charge that little punk for the full cost, warning him that if he cries you will charge him for two.

I kid.

Damage is inevitable for a public library.  The books for check out are meant to be destroyed, almost by design.  Outside of a patron maliciously tearing the book, damage by overt recklessness, or the odd patron who will write to "correct" the literature with ink pen, most get away with it.  And if you want to know what "overt recklessness" is, I once charged a guy for a Chilton car repair manual because he used it as a tire stop when raising his car to fix it.  It still had tire marks on it.  He did not mean to damage it, but he paid for it.

Hit the jump for a couple of links for repairing books and a cool video.

Minnesota Historical Society- Caring for Damaged Books
How to Repair Different Parts of Books When Damaged 

How to Repair Used Books —powered by eHow.com

Young Upstart "Rowling" May Begin Publishing eBooks

An obscure writer named J. K. Rowling has begun thinking about converting her seven book series "Henry Palmer" into eBooks after the demand in the eBook market increased over the last few months.  Very little is known about this reclusive and near destitute author, so much so that we could only find reference for her career in the clearance bin of a local Borders as it closes.

The only worth in posting this information is that even small, unheard of authors who work in the back closet of a cleaning company fixing broken mops all day are switching to the new format.  We hope they have luck in their new endeavor, these poor poor souls.

Scotsman via Christian Science Monitor

The Librarian Has Rink Rash

Wheels of Fury

Once there was a librarian named Kate Mossman, the assistant director of the Everett Public Library in Everett, Washington.  Kate loved... stuff, I guess, I do not have that information.  What I do know is that she saw some roller derby girls at a Forth of July parade four years ago and decided to kick some ass.  Now, as part of the "Camaro Harem," Mossman has transformed into "Missus Unshine," a badass librarian thrashing the rink and taking fines out of your boo-tay.  Skate or die, Missus Unshine!

What would your roller derby name be, if you were awesome enough to have one?  I always liked Judy Boom, Bomb Clancy, Rudyard Crippling, Nancy Drewblood, Jane Bondage, Agony Christie, Jane Ire, Beatrix Plotter, or maybe E. M. Forcer, but, like the song says, "I'm a dude so I'll just have to watch."

HeraldNet and Local News, HeraldNet