K is for Knowledge

 

The American Heritage College Dictionary, my personal favorite, defines "knowledge" as "The state or fact of knowing... familiarity, awareness, or understanding gained through experience or study."  Experience or study?  I like that, gives me an idea for a small play.

Hit the jump for "Cavemen of the Vanities"

Cavemen of the Vanities

ext.  Outside at night near the opening of a cave, 10,000 B.C.  
Two cavemen are sitting outside looking upward at the ominous clouds rolling over and blotting out the stars.  

Carl

I say, old man.  I think we should head inside.

Randy

Truly, this storm seems swift.  However, the humidity is not yet above the maximum amount for rain.  I fear in this dry climate we may only see lightning and thunder.  Nothing more.

Carl

Don't you mean "see lightning and hear thunder?" (laughs)

Randy

(laughs) Quite correct.  Thank you for pointing out my indiscretion.  I can be quite aloof.

Suddenly, a bolt of lightning strikes a nearby tree.  The tree explodes, sending a fiery log to land directly in front of the caveman.

Randy

(scared) Holly bells!  The orange demon is back.  Allow us to KILL IT.

Carl

Quite so!

Randy and Carl begin to hit the fiery log with their wooden clubs.  The clubs catch fire.  In a rash decision, Carl bludgeons Randy to death with his fiery club.  

Carl

Oh, maker.  What has happened?  I just wanted his body water to chase the demon from my club.  What has happened?

Carl looks from Randy (who is now a smoking, bloody heap) to the club (which still has some flame).

Carl

What has happened?  I know.  The orange demon made me do it.  Made me strong.  Orange demon good!  Good, indeed!  Demon from sky, make Carl best there is!  Carl destroy all who oppose!

Fin

So, there is our first step in knowledge.  Stay tuned and we will be discussing  "knowledge" in more detail with "Serendipity" and "Wiki Effect."

Print Continues a Slow Death

I want to die in my sleep like printed media, not screaming and yelling like the floppy disk in the drive next to it.  First, there was little bit of fun, that, while being funny, contains some truth to the downfall of the readers of literature in general.  But my real pain comes from the unconfirmed reports that Grolier's Encyclopedia Americana will no longer be printed.  After the acquisition of Grolier by Scholastic in 2000, the encyclopedia has been in a waning decline, last published as the 2006 edition in print.  The company has kept the encyclopedia alive in electronic format, but is that as good as print?  I say no.

I LOVE YOU, MY FRIST TRAPPER KEEPER!

Now, as I said, this is unconfirmed.  I did not send out any emails to companies or put any effort (besides a couple of quick searches) into verifying my sources because, honestly, who cares?  I am mourning a piece of my childhood (and a publication that has been in print since 1829). 

I feel that knowledge is becoming too easy.  While I embrace technology, I feel it is making us weak.  The tactile gift that books give to knowledge, the smell of ink and paper, the sound of a turning page, the feel of papercuts, is one that stays with you.  The sound of keys typing a Google search reminds me of nothing.

Anyway, here's a puppy trying to stay awake.