What Did I Learn in Library School? Reference Interview

So it is Friday again, which means it is time for me to reflect back on what I learned in library school.  I try to think of all the excersises and worksheets and papers, and pull out the scraps of information that have actually helped or hindered me in my career.  Today's fun topic is the Reference Interview.

What is a Reference Interview?
A reference interview is defined by ODLIS as "the interpersonal communication that occurs between a reference librarian and a library user to determine the person's specific information need(s), which may turn out to be different than the reference question as initially posed."  I define it as "a magical mystery tour of the imagination by a librarian wherein he/she pulls information out of the patron's ass until they leave."  Potato, Potato.  As I may have stated in the past, the patrons hate us.  Bunches.  Whether they are simply trying to confuse your mind or just wipe that smile off your face, the reference interview is your only defense.

"Why do you keep smiling like that!  I hate your happiness!"

Who can use the Reference Interview?

Now, you may be asking yourself, who can use this mystical art?  Through proper training, anyone can be taught the basics of RI, but only a few have the true talent.  In the library, it is known as "The Way."  The Way is a set of skills and talents that causes others to become pacified, their questions answered, and their day brightened.  Each library has one talented in "The Way."  He or she is called into most difficult scenarios where the patron has become livid.  After a few quick moments, the practitioner has gleaned the information from the patron and set them on the right path.  

The Basics

Not all of us know "The Way." Therefore we must be taught the basics of the reference interview.  The most common mistake new librarians make is assuming.  When you assume, you make an ass out of you, not the patron cause he/she knows exactly what he/she came to the library for and you are hindering the situation.  Ask questions, even if it is the most basic type of information available. The patron will start the questioning, but you must finish it.  Treat it as a game to see who is the better human.  The first person to make a statement loses.  The best questions start with "Do you need..."  Consider the following example:

Patron:  Do you have information about screwdrivers?

Librarian:  Do you need a history, how to use them, or how to make them?

P: Why would I need to know the history?

L: Do you need to know the history?

P: No, I just wanna make the drink!

L: Ha!  Yahtzee! 641.874!  Do you need me to read it to you, punk!

As you can see, the "Do you need" method is surprisingly effective as long as you do not let it derail you.  Here is a bad version of the same example:

Patron:  Do you have information about screwdrivers?

Librarian:  Do you need to get drunk or just directions to the nearest wussy bar?

P:  What!?

L:  Do you need me to show you how to mix one up?  Come into my office!

P:  I just wanted to know the best brand of phillips heads! 

L:  Not today, Nancy!  You and me are gettin crunk!

As you can see, the librarian in example 2 allowed his personal feelings to get in the way of a proper reference interview.  It did not help that earlier in the day he lost his goldfish in a brutal custody battle with his crazy, hair dressing EX-girlfriend who honestly would not know how to feed a goldfish if the damn thing ate the shattered dreams of the men in her wake.  But I digress.

Really that is all you need to know to get you started.  After that, it only takes a couple of years to fake that happy, shiny person that the public for some reason wants to see and loathe.  Never let them see the truth.  They can not handle your hate.  They will hate you, so I say let them.  And help them, cause you are getting paid on their dime.  

References:
A Library Science Dictionary
Where to find drinkin' books at NYPL

Sacrilicious

Hit the Road, Jack: See the Ray Charles Memorial Library

The Ray Charles Memorial Library opened today, his 80th birthday, in Los Angeles.  Personally, I would have liked to see it in Georgia, but what do I know?

The whole story from NPR

Ask a Crazy Librarian: Goofy

Question: What kind of animal is Goofy? 

Answer:  This is a question for the ages.  Many a man has scoured the Internet ever since Gordie Lachance posed the question in Stand By Me in 1986.  The path to this answer is many-fold.

1.)  We must first look at Goofy Goof (his real name) in appearance.  Sure, he drives a car, wears pants, speaks and laughs and has hopes and dreams.  This must make him a man.  According to my ex-wife, however, this does not make anyone a man.  Especially if he cries at movies like Stand By Me.  The erect posture and somewhat intelligent demeanor only make him humanoid, a sniveling wreck of a thing being capable of mediocre tasks but not proficient in the art of happiness. 

The presence of a snout and floppy ears seem to indicate something, but only because they reach out to be noticed.  Like a man who waters the flowers every day, hoping to create light in a dark world, only to have some bitch run them over with her car after a night at the bar with her "friends" Manuel and Chuck.  Yeah, Goofy wants to be a man, all right, but certain features keep him less.

2.)  Next, we look into his past.  In his first appearance, Goofy was known as Dippy Dawg.  Spelling aside, this name conveys much.  The painful heartache his family must have inflicted upon him to name him "Dippy" is horrendous.  Even if this was a nickname, given to him by his "friends" Manuel and Chuck, after a night out with his wife they should have cared more.  Only a subhuman monster would allow such a moniker. 

3.)  The sounds he makes.  Are they human?  That laugh.  Feel the pain as he "enjoys" himself night after night, alone, yuk yuking but deeply hollow.  Soulless.  Murderous.  That cry.  "Ya-ha-ha-hoo-ee" indeed, sir. 

4.)  His social circle.  Between a mouse, a duck, and a Goofy, who is always the best friend?  Who is always kind, forgiving, innocent of the world around him and the horrible, horrible ex-wives that beat the soul out of a creature?  Who always has time to, say, help an ex-wife move out of his own house on his day off with his "best friends" Manuel and Chuck, who disappeared into the new bedroom as I set up the my own stereo system in a new house?  Who goes and picks up the pizza when they take a break? Who?  I'll tell you who!

A DOG!  That's right, a damn dog.  Enjoy a clip of this dog struggling.

References: 
Disney Archive Bio- Lists his first appearances and compares him to Pluto, who is definitely a dog.
Goofy on Wikipedia... Mmmm... Sacrilicious

Have a question for the Crazy Librarian?  Email bannedlibrary@gmail.com

We Weed with a Blowtorch!

The library at Colorado State University is planning on weeding roughly 25 percent of its 2.5 million collection.  I have been at libraries that did collection removal in the thousands, but cracking that million mark must feel awesome!  It must be like when Jaws hit $100 million.  Of course, other libraries are sure to try and follow suit.  Next thing you know we will have panels at ComicCon and CGI dinosaurs running about the Rockies. 

Here's the full article, and no they are not throwing them away or selling them, ya cheapskates.

Shouting for a Library!

Apparently the Chicago area really likes their buildings to become useful. 

"A group of Chicago parents and community members have staged a round-the-clock sit-in at a field house adjacent to Whittier Elementary School in Pilsen, demanding that the dilapidated building be turned into a school library." -- School Library Journal (Link to full article)

Leading with chants that "[They] want a library" I have to wonder if they know what they are getting into.  Do they know that if their plans succeed, this will be the last time they are able to shout in that area?  Can they handle that? 

Either way, I applaud them.  Not many people sit down and shout for what they believe in.  Doubly so when that cause is libraries.  Bravo, Chicago!

Computer Repair Guide: Malware

Some of you out there are wondering, what is malware and HOW ARE YOU READING MY MIND!?  First, malware (from the root word "ware" meaning "stuff" and "mal" meaning "crusty Internetz") is a basic part of living life online.  No matter who you are and what you do online, you will encounter it, often without even knowing that you are.  After the jump, I will give you the basics of what malware is and how you can protect yourself from it.

What is malware?
Okay, can everyone be seated?  Good, good.  Okay, "malware" is basically any type of software that you do not wish to have on your computer.  There are three basic types: adware, spyware, and viruses.  Adware often comes from advertisements, or what the Phoneticians called "ads."  They clog up your system by causing pop-ups and other annoying information on the screen.  Spyware is legal yet sometimes malicious code that identifies the user by collecting data, etc. for various purposes.  Viruses are what you get from opening those emails your mom forwards you.  Just kidding. You can get them from anyone.  Of the three, viruses can be the most debilitating, however all have the potential to slow down the performance of your machine.

How do I get malware?
Malware is all over the internet.  Adware and Spyware are contained in a variety of sources, from those flashing adds promising you $100 for your used tissues to a pop-up of (insert famous actor/actress) doing coke off a bulldog.  The most common misconception is that you have to click on these flashing happy do-dads to get the malware.  Nuh-uh.  By going to the page itself, you have already participated and exposed yourself.  Again, once in a while is okay, but for an active surfer with little protection, it is like shaking hands with every person you see in a day.  By the end of the day grime and crust will cause even Teflon to stick to your hand.  Viruses are the particular nasty end of the spectrum, like the flu or children. 

Is there a way to never get malware?
Never go online.  It is the only way to never get any type of malware.  Seriously.  Become the Internet bubble boy. 

How do I protect myself?
The easiest way is prevention.  Know the websites you go to, like name brands.  "Beer" brand beer made in the back of a pickup truck might be awesome, but you know where Budweiser came from.  Do not open any emails you do not recognize.  If for some reason it looks like your computer illiterate dad suddenly learned to type in ASCII, might not wanna open that one. If you have any doubt that the attachment called "hot lovin" is not your grandmother's prize chili recipe, do not open it.

I think I have malware.  What now?
DOOM!  HORRIBLE DOOM!
Except, no.  If there's one great and tragic thing about the human experience, it is that you are probably not the first person to have this happen to you.  Honestly, google it.  Anything.  Somebody else did or experienced or imagined it first.  Six billion and change, folks, more than half have access to the Internet.  That's a whole lot of experience to draw from.  In fact, many companies have made businesses off of it.
It really all goes back to prevention.  Running scans of your computer is easy and there are many free programs that allow you to do so.  Here's a list of several free ones.  Select multiple or all of them and take a weekend or night or so and free your computer from the stress.

Adaware
Spybot
Malwarebytes

Most computers come with six months or so of antivirus software.  They are good, but here's some free ones that are just as good after that first six months:

AVG
Avast! (great protection, but when it detects something, you will know it.  Like fog horn know.)

Best not to use more than one antivirus program at a time, they generally stay active at all times and more than one can slow your computer as much as the malware they are trying to prevent.

Oh, and that second thing?  I HAVE SUPERPOWERS FOR YOUR MIND HOLE, DUDE!

The Big Book Sale Begins!

For those of you in the San Francisco area or those who really like book sales, The Big Book Sale Begins!  I do not know why I like typing that so much.

Apparently people really like book sales.  Who knew?