Hawaii Schools Lack Librarians, Where Do I Sign Up?

According to the Star Advertiser, about 16 percent of Hawaii's public schools are without a librarian, despite the fact that all have a functioning library.  Okay, I will bite the bullet and go to Hawaii.  I knew it would come to this.  I knew that this day would come and I would have to stand up and deliver myself into the belly of the beast, the end of the earth, the land of palm and fire.

 

Truly, this is hell on earth.

I once heard Christopher Moore say (and I am paraphrasing), "Living in Hawaii is like dating a supermodel.  After a while you just want conversation."  Well, I am willing to dive into the Hawaiian Hades if I never again have the type of daily conversations that suck out my soul.  While I have never been to Hawaii, I would gladly throw myself on this tropical grenade.

I know now what this calling of the librarian, a call that sounds suspiciously like the the pages of a book rustling, would lead me to uncharted disasters in need of relief.  If we can help but one library, one class of surfer dudes, just one hula dancer, then my sacrifice would have not been in vain.  May God have mercy on my well tanned soul.  

Image from here