7 Reasons Porn Should Be Allowed in the Library

Some unholy, disturbing things happen right in the public view.  I am not talking about beatings, murders, rapes, and riots either.  I am talking about the silent oddities and eccentricities that set off the Somebody Else's Problem Drive in our brains and allow us to turn away unscathed.  Two elderly pimps on a tandem bicycle, a man with a snake weaved into his weave, cats dressed as people, it never ends but it is part of everyday life.  Even in the smallest of towns there is always someone a little "touched in the head," as my grandmother used to say.  How come consensual sex is not part of this list (outside of New Orleans)?

Everybody does it.  It is literally why we are all here.  And like everything, some individuals fetishize it.  Some abuse it.  Some downright worship it.  Is this because it is still a taboo topic in modern society?  Is it because there are still laws on the books about "irregular" sex such as sodomy, oral and, well anything except the puritanical makin'-baby lovin' of the missionary position?  Are we backwards or is the system backwards or are we backwards because of the system?  I am not here to answer any of those questions.  I am here because of a debate that is now on simmer but could boil over at anytime: porn in the library.

Earlier this week, a lawsuit was filed against the Birmingham Public Library by one of its library assistants.  In the suit, the worker claims that administrators allegedly did nothing to stop the use of pornographic images and video on library computers by patrons.  I suppose displaying such material is against library policy and even state law.  This comes on the heels of the New York library allowing porn to be looked up on its own computers.  These are not isolated incidents, just a way of life in the world of public information.  Should we regulate what information people have access to, or just patron behavior as they access it?  I have "reported" on this kind of stuff before, but now I feel it is time to play devil's advocate.

What is the upside of porn in the library?  Well, I thought of seven reasons.  Check them out after the jump.

1.  1st Amendment

Allowing "Fixing the Cable" everywhere

Information should be free.  That is not just a chant for hackers and those weirdos online that like to download every season of "My Little Pony."  If information is freely spoken, then that information should be freely obtainable within copyright law.  Some will argue art and entertainment, vital news vs fluff news, but when it all comes down to it, it is information freely spoken.  Ideas, beliefs, man on woman on man on donkey action, whatever, are information that can be freely found online.  Denying information is wrong and is censorship, pure and simple.  This should not be "American," this should be a global truth.

2.  Identify the Creeps

Exhibit A.

What can a privacy screen show that a middle-aged man in sweatpants hanging around the children's department at noon not tell you?  Not much.  But all the weirdos do not look like Lester the Molester.  Some have ties, slacks, and a basic knowledge of hygiene.  If staff see pornography being viewed in a public library, they can file those people away in their brains.  The "normal" people can be silently filed away as potential problems simply by what they are viewing.  Remember, this is a public library.  What you are doing is not private and will allow others to make judgement on you.

3.  More Tame than Literature (and Better than Twilight)

For Kids!

Ever heard of an author named Zane?  This author makes Cinemax blush.  They are also fairly well written books that never fail to entertain.  I am only singling out her because she is one of many erotic authors that is present on library shelves across the nation.  Erotic, violent, and subversive fiction and nonfiction populate the shelves and are heavily checked out.  Even the Twilight series, a series for young adults, fetishizes lust and carnal desire in the absence of common interests and conversation.  One could argue that by reading these scenes and causing your own mind to come up with the emotions and visuals could be more damaging and changing than the dirtiest porn or the most violent video game.  I know several books that changed my life by introducing themes and emotions I would not otherwise had access to, let alone a quasi dialog with.  I love video games, but I really cannot think of one that caused that in me.  And as far as porn goes, it does not hide what it is.  Like Animal Planet, porn on the internet is often a documentary of two or more animals going at it with little story or need for investment by the viewer.

4.  Allow Staff to Concentrate on More Pressing Problems
Budget problems, patron disputes, lost materials, these are library problems.  Worrying about what people are accessing on the internet should not be.  If someone is reading a book, I do not care why.  I should not care why another person is online.  As I librarian, I have other concerns.  Will we be staffed tomorrow?  Is the HVAC system working in the middle of summer?  Are all the computers running correctly?  Do we have enough change in the money drawers?  Will the summer reading program be done before the book club gets here because we read the killer clown book this month and those old ladies can not take the shock?  If I know Lester the Molester is safe at a computer terminal, then that is one problem off my book for the day.  Every little bit helps.

5.  Healthy Alternative to Animal Mating Videos

Rule 34: Slash Fic for all occations

Imagine if you will, a normal library day.  A cry of a baby from the children's department.  A cough from the silent reading room.  The reek-reek-reek of receipt printers.  Then one of the staff calls me over to the computer lab.  A teenager, fourteen or so, has been causing problems in the lab.  Not loud.  Not talking back.  His parent signed the access form, so he is there with no recourse.  Nope, it was because he was viewing horses doin' it.  And doin' it well.  And urinating.  And a myriad of other acts that I did not know horses could do.  No people, because YouTube will not allow that.  Just horses.  Here's a link, spoilers: horses doin' it.  No choice but to let him continue because, well, that is not covered in the "doin' it" policy or the state indecency laws.  We all get curious when we are young, but come on.  Please do not let this be your child.  Porn is not that bad.

6.  Won't Have to Replace the Art and Exercise Materials So Often

National Pornographic

Walk into the public restroom or all the way in the back to that lonely quiet corner of the library.  What will you find there?  The Joy of Sex, Shape Magazine, and The Art of Drawing.  Like the National Geographic before them, these books and their ilk show boobies.  Those boobies make them a target for stealing, not returning, and hiding in the dark recesses of the library, so much so that some libraries make them request items.  If porn was freely available on the library computers, no one would even think of actually looking for the stuff.  Just Google it, am I right?

7.  WiFi Already Lost Us The Control
Look around your library.  How many smartphones, laptops, tablets and video game systems can you count?  I carry at least four WiFi-enabled, internet capable devices on me just cause that's what I have.  Our library's WiFi, like most libraries, requires no key to gain access to it.  Hell, even outside of libraries there are at least 10 WiFi spots within a two minute drive, and we are not even that big a city.  Now think about all that access, free and relatively unfiltered.  Someone is already used and/or using your library for porn.  Not just the bikini pics of girls in Cosmo, either, real-funky-cold-Medina porn.  So, sorry to tell you, libraries are already allowing access.  Even the most advanced filter can not catch everything.  It is okay if you do not see it, though, right?

Have something to say? Leave a comment or email at evan@bannedlibrary.com

Life in the Swag, ALA 2011

Well, I just got back from the American Library Association's 2011 New Orleans Conference and boy is my drinking arm tired.  New Orleans welcomed the library community with open arms and the library community responded in kind.  So let us delve into this exciting and wondrous event that was ALA 2011.

Drinking
I know what the people want so let's just put it on front street, or "rue el fronto" as the locals say.  Seriously, there was so much partying, dancing, and goings-on that you would have thought a dentist hygienist convention was going on.  But that's the point of a convention in New Orleans.  Nothing too untoward was released to the public, so let's keep it that way.  It's not like there was a robot that got taken out for a night, right?

You don't want to know how he got those beads and hat.

Technology
Possibly the biggest complaint about the conference was the lack of wifi at the convention.  To be true, the annual conference from one of the most forward thinking professions lacking a basic function that our national parks system can handle is a little sad.  But that's accentuating the negative.  The conference also had these cool key cards that you could swipe at booths instead of passing out business cards.  Mine stopped working after a day.

It also doubled as a hotel keycard for then entire city!   I watched people sleep!

Panels
I can't speak for all the panels (pun intended) because I only went to a couple because I had and "Exhibit Only" badge which means I had to crash. Which, honestly, was not that hard. Come to think of it, they only ever checked my badge at the exhibit entrances. Huh. Anyway, the panels I did go to were all about good speak and forward thinking. One in particular was a library of the future one with Orson Scott Card, Bill Willingham, and other sci-fi writers although come to think of it they mostly talked about copyright and stuff. It was good. Thought about asking about how Card felt about the New York gay marriage decision, but I felt that might have derailed it a bit.

My favorite panel.  It was all fun.

Exhibits
Here we go into the meat and potatoes of the convention: The people who give us stuff!  The swag merchants were out in force from the automated book thingies to the chair folk right on down to the database mages.  Every corner of librarianship stuff was represented, and all of them had stuff to take.  Often you would have to sit through a 10 minute talk to get a t-shirt, but if you put your business card in a fishbowl you might win a Nook or something.  It was all very exciting.  Special mention to the guy who did magic and the people with the smoothies.  We may never know who you worked for.

Some set up faster than others.  This was at 6ish on Friday.

Swag
I saw at least 4 people getting their arms reattached in the first aid area from collecting books in bags and hanging them off their shoulders.  The swag collecting was intense and diverse.  But can we talk about one thing?  The Red "I am a librarian from out of town mug me and over charge me, please" Bags.  All you who were there know what I mean.

All tote bags should have fighter jets on them.

Food
Hellz yeah!  This is New Orleans, the center of Cajun cooking!  Crawdads, gumbo, benya... beinge... those awesome pastries with the powdered sugar!  And what did most people eat?  Food court food.  Seriously, the only place within walking distance of the convention center was the crap in the convention center itself.  We could not find a couple sponsors willing to put authentic local cuisine?  Whatever, I am sure most had the other major food group in New Orleans.  Alcohol.

This is half the line for fairly dry roast beef sandwiches.  Spot the Red Bags.

Underground
Secret parties.  Dancing and carrying on.  I really can not talk about it too much.  My call sign was Albatross.

We got dangerous.

People
Someone on twitter asked what our favorite moment of ALA 2011 was. I responded "Walking on the floor first and seeing a sea of inspired, wonderful librarians sharing and having fun." That's the truth.  With all the problems and jokes, I met so many people that were excited about our future.  Before this convention, the best I could say about the library's future in society is "I hope."  After this trip, that hope is invigorated. 

   

Jackson Square.  And my thumb.

The Future of Libraries in Society: A Cat in a Box

Ever hear of Schrodinger's cat?  Really smart dude named Schrodinger came up with it.  Go figure.  The idea is that if you put a cat in a box with a deadly poison that can be released at any random time, the cat can be thought of as both alive and dead at the same time until you open the box and find out.  It's a physics thing.  Now that I have horrified the cat lovers, let me explain how this relates to libraries.

The cat represents the library's future place in society, the box is time moving forward, and the poison is new emerging technologies.  Great things can be accomplished if librarians have the stones to grab hold of technologies in interesting and user friendly ways.  Dead things will happen if we either lag behind or adopt the wrong technologies at the wrong times.  The problem is we will not know until we cross that event horizon in the future and see if what we have done is worthwhile.

So why am I going on about this?  I wanna look into the future.  Now, I will steer clear of Ray Kurzweil and the Singularity because, frankly, it illicits both shock and awe out of my tuccus.  Check out his books and lectures on the subject if you want a real scientified view.  As a librarian who has watched tech unfold these last 15ish years while hanging around libraries, this is what I think and at times hope will happen.  Hit the jump for the timeline.

2 Years - eBook Access to All
Now, I know what you are thinking: "eBooks are already accessible to all" and "Get out of my head, demon!"  The answers to both are "nuh-uh."  Today, eBooks are licensed to either specific machines or carriers.  With exclusivity rights, that means some carriers (cough, Kindle, cough)  cannot access certain content or have their content accessed on other platforms.  All well and good, but I bet you in two years people are going to get fed up with having five apps on their phones just to read their favorite books.  A universal format will emerge (probably ePub with more DRM) and books will be set free once again.

3 years - Universal eBook Carriers
A year after the eBook format war ends, a universal book carrier will emerge.  One entity, possibly the LoC, Project Gutenberg or more likely Overdrive, will rise and begin collecting and distributing ebooks in much the same way a Baker & Taylor does now.  They buy from the publisher and libraries buy from them at lower rates with less risk.  This sounds like what Overdrive is doing now, but not really.  At the moment, services like this are at the publisher's whim, as evidenced by the Harper Collins 26 checkout limit.  After publishers agree on a format and the rules, i.e. less tempted into hissy fits, universal carriers will evolve.  Companies will rise to cover the wholesale markets, such as libraries.

5 years - 3D OPACs Online over broadband
Now that eBooks are in the norm, people begin to look for access.  In five years, broadband service will be as common and cheap as the telephone.  This will allow for greater connectivity speeds and use for the average OPAC catalog search.  Innovation will arise for the user interface.  Imagine an OPAC where instead of a list of books and maybe a cover photo, the OPAC was a 3D representation of the library.  As most video games today, the user could "walk" around this 3D world, pull books off the shelf, and browse looking for that moment of serendipity that only comes when wandering through the stacks and finding that perfect book.

10 years - Universal WiFi, Realistic AI Reference Help
With broadband now expanded to every area of the civilized world, people will turn to high speed wireless communications.  Speeds over wireless will be possible that will make 3G look like dial-up.  Libraries will be at the forefront of this revolution as we expand our already free signals out into the communities, either by partnering with large companies or buying the transmitters.  Every mobile device, meaning even your toaster by that point, will be able to connect to the Internet for free with access increasing at an exponential rate.
At the same time universal WiFi begins to spread, artificial intelligence will spread as well.  That artificial intelligence will respond to humans in a convincing way, enough to answer any question it is asked.  Sounds scientific and too crazy modern?  Text "Weather" and your zip code to the number 466453 (GOOGLE) on your cell.  Some computer out there will respond to you with accurate and up-to-date information in a matter of moments.  Also, they have already beaten us at Jeopardy, so let us just get ready for them to answer our reference questions.  Just do not think about that dumbass robot "team mate" on Call of Duty that keeps shooting you and the wall.

15 years - Full AI Hologram Librarians
Riding on the coattails of a better functioning AI will be the representation of that AI.  Full holograms will begin to be used throughout society in a fully responsive way,  not just recordings like the London airport holograms.  The self checkout station will come fully equipped with a 3D model librarian that offers full librarian functionality on the fly.  As long as they do not call it "Marian the Librarian," all should be well.

20 years - All Information Digitally Archived
Although the process has already begun with groups like Google and Project Gutenberg, digital information will become the medium of choice for future generations.  The idea of going to a place, like a records department, to access books of information will be preposterous to a society that will essentially live online.  The effect this will have on libraries will be immediate as libraries become more sparsely populated with only those patrons who need our services because they do not understand how to navigate the information super-duper highway that will be created.

30 years - Public Libraries Become Museums
The public library as we know it will cease to exist.  Look around the library of today versus 20 years ago and see how much it has changed.  Think about the exponential growth from the card catalog to the OPAC to the WiFi enabled netbook that when it passed its 2 year anniversary the staff began calling it "Old Bessie."  Think about what the librarian you grew up with would say if she saw someone sipping out of a Starbucks cup that he or she bought downstairs.  With universal WiFi, AI to assist patrons, nearly all paper scanned and cheaper electronics to access information, libraries will become more about knowledge than pure access.  School groups and study partners will become our main patrons.  The public library will become more like museums of today, quiet places to sit, contemplate, and eat cocktail wienies while talking to pretentious artists, authors and local public officials.  The library will become a status symbol for a town.

50 years - Government agencies will stop requiring faxes
This is optimistic, but I can hope.

What do you think will happen in the future of libraries?  Am I just projecting too much like Back to the Future II (only 4 years left to get me a hoverboard, science guys) or do I have some valid points?  Comment below or email evan@bannedlibrary.com