Michigan Library Has to Fight to Keep Handguns Out of Their Library

The Capitol Area District Library in Michigan actually has had to go to court to keep people from bringing handguns into their library.  Best part?  They only have a temporary restraining order, meaning that it could be repealed.  This is serious.  I am not making this up.

I am going to say this only once.  WEAPONS DO NOT BELONG IN A LIBRARY FOR ANY REASON.  I can not think of any reason for a patron to have to bring any weapon in a library.  I even reread a previous post I wrote on the subject of open carry.  Not one reason.

Are there moose in this library that patrons have to defend themselves from?  On the way to the large print collection do you have to fend off a bear?  Are wolverines protecting the DVDs?

Handgun, samurai sword, monkey with a slingshot, I do not care.  Open carry or not, you bring a weapon in my library and I am calling the cops.

Spider-man Sells for Over $1 Million

 A copy of Amazing Fantasy #15, the first appearance of Spider-Man, sold this week for over $1 million according to The Toronto Sun.  You hear that folks, hang onto your 60 year old really rare comics and you might get some coin.  I mean it, remember that Superman (vol. 2) #75 Death of Superman that is holding up your end table?  In 20 years that could be worth, I dunno... dollars, man.  


The most messed up part of this?  Because of inflation, $1 million to day was worth 12 cents in 1961 dollars.  Economy, man.  Dude just wants to read a damn comic book.

5 Vices in the Library to Give Up for Lent

Happy Fat Tuesday, every body!  I am not a practicing anything (maybe pastafarian), but even I can see the reason for the season.  Mardi Gras, the end of which is tonight on Fat Tuesday, is a time for celebration and indulgence where we enjoy life to its fullest and celebrate our continued existence.  Lent is all about sacrifice, putting behind those celebratory feelings and getting a little perspective.  So when you go out and get wildly plastered on wine coolers tonight, remember that tomorrow and the next 39 days (or until Easter, personal time tables aside) are all about atoning and thinking about what you could give up.  With that in mind, I give you 5 Vices in the Library to Give Up for Lent:


Special Note:  Most workplaces, including libraries, have rules against booze and handguns on the premises.  I am not going to talk about such mundane vices because, well, you are really not supposed to do that anyway.  Also, breaks and lunches are often state mandated, so you do not get those either.


1. Snacks

Put'em down, Jimmy

Oh, how we love a soft drink or bag of chips on break or at lunch.  Chomping down on that sugary, fatty goodness is sometimes the only relief we have in a day.  But think of what it would mean to give that up.  To spend your break sitting quietly reading without Jimmy from IT chomping down on a Dorito three feet away.  Heaven.

2.  Social Networks and Blogs

I'm your friend...

Most libraries have rules about how their workers use the computers, but come on, most of you are reading this right now at work, am I right?  That's okay, like the snacks this little pitstop can refuel you to go out and deal with that guy who has made 32 copies of his hand and wants his money back.  Giving up all the Twitters, Facebooks, and blogs will give you a little more productivity, though.  Plus, you can always read us on your break instead of getting down with a bag of chips.

3.  Cellphone

Seductress, you are...

Again, jobs really do not like it when you use your cell at work.  Again, most of you have it with you right now, though, huh?  The gentle vibrate of a text or notice in your pocket comforts you, makes you aware that, "hey, you're not alone."  Well, lock that thing in your desk while you are on the clock.  All your "followers" and "friends" can wait, and if they can not, go old school and have them call the library.

4.  Chairs

Not for library attire.

Give up your chair when you are at work.  One of the greatest pieces of advice for constructing a library I ever heard was "Make every desk chest high."  When people are standing, they are more likely to be active and helpful.  Yes, your feet will hurt at the end of the day.  I apologize if your shoes do that to you.  Possibly, it is time to get better shoes for working in.  Plus, they make some real stylish walkin shoes, I hear.

Ambrosia

5.  Coffee
Now is the time for a real sense of sacrifice.  Possibly to others.  Coffee, that sweet nectar of the gods, Mr. C, all that is great about the morning.  Give it up.  Cold.  More than anything else on this list coffee should show people that you are serious about what you will and will not sacrifice in your life.  If you can do this, you are a stronger soul than most, a divine one.  Go to it, you golden god.

Now, for those of you sitting in comfy chairs sipping a cup of joe, munching on biscotti and reading this on your iphone, for shame.  You have much to atone for and should start from the bottom up.

5 Reasons Libraries Should Use eBooks... Now

A whole new world...

Last week we did a little thought experiment to come up with 5 Reasons Libraries Should Not Use eBooks... Yet.  During that lovely discussion, we theorized that libraries were ill equipped to handle a market so in flux even it does not agree on a pricing model just yet.  But hey, that's no reason to stop talking about the subject like civilized, grammar loving Americans, now is it?  So how's about we take the other side of the fence and come up with a few reasons to adopt this new fantabuloso format for freading (really "reading" but I love alliteration).  Any whoosle, hit the jump for 5 Reasons Libraries Should Use eBooks... Now.

1.  The Public Expects Us To.
Just like any other information technology out there, the public expects the library to be on top of whatever comes out.  Plus, we done books for years!  Why the hell not ebooks, too?  Makes perfect sense to anyone, just ask.

Like Johnny Applescreamer, here.

2.  We've Adopted Worse, It's a Learning Experience
I heard a story of a small town library that was so excited to get a dial up Internet connection.  Then, just a few weeks later, the schools cut a deal with the cable company and got a broadband line.  I am all for the tortoise beating the hare, but when you are talking Internet speed dial up might as well go on and hire a guy to whack the broadband in the knee then cry about its laces.  That's a Tonya Harding joke, kids.  I digress.  The library learned its lesson and sought out the best tech after that.

She really did become a tortoise, I hear.

3.  Libraries Expect Us to
Libraries in general put a lot of pressure on each other, much like that kid in grade school who made fun of you for wearing off brand instead of Air Jordan's.  Peer pressure is a great motivator.  When the cool library in the next county has ebooks, we gotta have them, too.  Keeping up with the Jones' Counties is hard work, but if it is done right you can get page one in the features section.

Now we're kickin'

4.  The Media, Man
Tied heavily to the public, the coverage in the media can shape library services.  If the big story is a resurgence of the 1882 Bolivia Monkey Pox, you better start stocking up on books on obscure South American diseases.  Same goes for every service.  If the media begins an ebook blitzkrieg, tighten up the hatches and get ready to spend that "fix the hole over the biographies" money in the budget.

Watch it all go down...

5.  Old People Are Dying
Fun fact:  everyone under the age of 20 who lives in an area that poops inside has no idea of a life before the Internet or cellphones.  They have lived their entire lives in a cloud of 1's and 0's.  Here's another idea to horrify you: They are the growing majority.  The competition is death.  Folks that remember rotary phones and "Papa getting the Sears and Roebuck to go to the outhouse" are quickly becoming the minority.  Soon, the old people will be gone and nobody will be reading print.  Libraries must embrace this society that never knows a paper cut less we become just another term for them to Google.  That sounded dirty.

Google me, I dare you.

Poll Results Are In, Next Poll is Live!

Last weeks first annual weekly poll was "What's the best thing about being a librarian?"

Well, the results were mixed.  Of those surveyed, 0% said "The money" was why they chose the profession.  Next to last was "The women" with 21% of the vote, which I think is a shame as there are some truly lovely ladies in our profession.  In second place was "The power" with 35% of the vote, proving even the sweethearts out there want to rule the world.  Finally, our winner with 44% of the vote was "Saying hello to your little friends," proving that librarians love custodians and carnie folk just as much as they love children.

Check out this week's poll "What's your favorite way of relieving tension at the library?" Also remember we always take write-in responses, so email at evan@bannedlibrary.com

Someone Get Elton John an iPod

Elton John recently commented that he had a new room built to hold his music collection complete with librarian to take care of it all.  Really?  EJ is so busy he can't spend a Saturday with iTunes and clear that stuff up himself?  I guess in this job market you can not really complain, but "Elton John, that's right the Elton John's personal CD librarian" does not really roll off the resume, now does it?

And honestly, when did digital music become the poor people's medium?  I can see them now at Rich People Villa, "Oh, yes, Muffy, I simply had so many episodes of MacGyver on the discs, I had to hire someone to take care of it all."

Check out the rest of what EJ had to say here.

How About Dem: Apple News

Ipad or Picture Frame?

Wow, big news in Apples this week, huh?  Looks like Steve Jobs has been working overtime, securing new deals, laying down the law, crunching numbers, and maybe, just maybe, picking up a sweet new turtleneck.  Let's go over a few of the greatest hits, shall we?

The most obvious is the announcement of the iPad 2, a March 11 release date, some fancy gadgetry and other techie crap.  As you might can tell, I could care less.  I have an iPhone, but I plan to get rid of it and pick up something Android as soon as possible.

The next "big" news was the addition of Random House to the iBookstore.  I use the Kindle app when I want to buy an ebook and honestly, now that I have typed it out, do not trust a company that does business with a "random house."  My brother used to do business at a "random house" with a "product" and we get to see him again in 2-3 years with good behavior.

The news that ties all this together is the number crunchers over at Cult of Mac want you to know that 15 times the amount of apps are being sold than ebooks.  Yep, with all their wheeling and dealing over at Fruit Land, they ain't donin much o' nuttin. 

Let me know what you think.