Banned Books Week Begins and Here's Where Its Happening!

Banned Books Week is here again.  Banned Books Week was created to highlight the censorship and "celebrate the freedom to read."  Materials across the country are challenged for containing sex, language and themes some may find offensive.  As librarians and responsible people, we serve the public and our communities with materials that reflect their values and beliefs, but there must be room for other ideas under every roof.  Stocking these materials, these "banned books," should not be seen as going counter to your public.  Stocking these materials should be seen as showing your public that there is a place that all humanity can exist, even in their town, that there is room for other ideas that may run contrary to their own.

Plus, it is really awesome to watch a little old lady with purple hair and a punk rock chick with a pink mohawk bond over the same copy of the Wuthering Heights.

Here's a bunch of links from across the country about BBW (I just noticed the initials and laughed out loud.) as well as some starter links with those not familiar.  If you have a link for an event or a comment about Banned Books week, comment below or submit here.

ALA
Banned Books Week website
ALA Article
Frequently Challenged Books

Events and Articles:
University of North Carolina Wilmington
King's English Book Shop
Louisiana State University
Republic, MO
Bellingham, WA
Huffington Post + Challenged Books Infographic
Washington Depot, CT
Danville, CA
Bar Harbor and Southwest Harbor, MA
Davenport, IA
Eastern Iowa
Alameda, CA
San Francisco, CA (and City Lights)
Tuscon, AZ
Anderson, SC
Ocean County Library, NJ
South Bend, IN
Victoria College, Houston, TX
Alamogordo, NM
Montpelier, VT

Good Illinois Article from PJStar

Platform 9 3/8ths: Rowling and The Book

I am going to go out on a limb and bet most anybody alive in the last week has heard that J. K. Rowling, author of You Know What, released a new book.  I got tired of typing her name after one article, so I started collecting everything I read and decided to make a little story about it.  Here you go:

Once upon a time, in the land of Eng Land, there was a billionaire author, J. K. "Joking" Rowling, who decided to write a new book that had nothing to do with the books for which she was known.  Feeling the burden of progress, Joking decided to write some sexy, drug stuff and would not apologize for it.

When The Book came out, the first viewers looked once, then looked twice and were turned into the dreaded "Reviewers," friend or foe a billionaire can never tell.  The First Reviewer cast down the mighty Joking.  Despite this, The Book was set to make history in the form of money.  Conservative Reviewers called The Book "leftist screed."  Then, The New Yorking Timers Reviewers gave their word, and it was displeased.  Finally, the Huddled Masses Reviewers said it was cool by them.

The Library began to set up shop to dispense the book to the public, expecting long waiting lists.  Moms were especially excited, tired of all that kid wizard shit*.

During the furor, Joking claims that the books that every loved may becoming back, probably to get away from the fact that The eBook was expensive.

Then, disaster struck.  eCopies of The eBook, given away to first buyers of The Paper Copy Book, The eBook was broken.  One assumes people were on that.

One also assumes the billionaire Joking went about her life.

*Kid Wizard Shit is my hip hop name.

Avocado Ken-dolla! Harry Potter Franchise Near End

Two weeks away from the Harry Potter Part 8 and, man, you can feel the tension in the air.  Everyone is holding their breath in anticipation for how this monkey will hang.  Will Volvomelon kill Harry Potter?  Will Harry and Hermyknee get together like we all know they will?  Will they finally kill off that red haired kid that's been following Harry around all these years like they did with JarJar the House-elf* in the last movie?  I can not wait.

Does anyone know if they have made novelizations of the scripts?  I would love to see how they handled this series in print form.

Hit the jump for all the Harry Potter links you can imagine if you can only imagine about nine or so.

Top 5 Harry Potter Smackdowns

Parseltongue translator

Footage of the Bank Heist

Emma Watson Growing Up

What Harry Potter Really Thinks of Quidditch

Harry Potter Digital

Mark Reads Harry Potter

Harry Potter Movie Site

Random Article about Last Film

*I sobbed like a baby when Dobby died.  This is all in fun, please don't hate me.

The Reference Snake

Well, well.  Ain't we some sorry so & so's.  There just ain't nuthin funny about today's library news.  I go on the Google and I 'spect to see something worth mocking.  Something a little off.  Maybe eBooks started blowing right the hell up.  No, all I see is budget news, LoC exhibits, libraries closing, protests, and do not get me started with how sick I am with that stupid "Asians in the Library" video (I am not linking to that crap, Google it if you must).

Now I have to go to my roots.  Break out in dialect and shit.  Maybe tell y'all a story.

Gather 'round after the jump.

The Reference Snake     

     My library mentor was a man named Library Bill.  Bill worked reference back in the days before computers and had subsequently memorized the nonfiction collection.  When the computers arrived, his first act was to spit on them.  I found this encouraging as Bill had almost been thrown out of his MLIS program for peeing on a Coke machine in front of the dean.

     On a sunny November morning, Bill was showing me how to use the Reader's Advisory books to pick up girls.  We looked up as we heard shouting from the circulation desk.  A mud-bathed man stood gesturing wildly as the poor circulation librarian retreated.  Bill walked to the desk and I followed.

     "Can we help?" Bill asked.

     "Y'all got books on snakes?" the man asked.

     "Yep."

     "Follow me," the man said as he began following his own mud trail to the front door.

     Library Bill and I shrugged and followed the man to a blue Chevy pickup, also covered in mud.  In the cab was a sweet looking golden lab.  You could hear the dog's whine as we approached.

     The man lead us around the bed of the pickup.  He paused for a moment for us to catch up, then threw a burlap sack on the ground.  The sack moved.

     "It bit my dog," Mudman said, wiping his nose with the back of his hand, "Need to know if its poison.  Can't 'ford no vet less the dog's in trouble."

     Bill and I again looked at each other again.

     "Why's it alive?" Bill asked.

     "Ain't gonna kill nothing for doin what its sup'osed to do, Bill.  Plus, the vet might need it."

     "Sounds fair," Bill said, "Open her up."

     I was shocked to find he was looking at me.  I shook my head, "Above my pay grade, sir."

     The two men laughed and found a heavy stick to hold the snake down with while we identified it.  Now, you may be wondering, who is calling animal control or the police?  For the first part, guys like this were animal control.  For the second, we lived in what you would call "meth country." The boys in blue had better things to worry about.  Plus, all they would have done is stand around and argue about what kind of snake it was.  Then maybe shoot it, endangering us all.

     Anyway, the two of them wrangled the snake into a position where I could sketch out the markings.  Mudman tied the snake back up and we went to the books.  Five minutes later we had our identity and the dog was safe.

     Mudman was soon gone.

     Bill turned to me, his eyes a little far off, "Boy, I think I'm having a stroke.  Damn snake scared the shit out of me.  Here, call this number and tell my wife to come get me."  His hand shook as he handed me a card with neat handwriting on it.  Bill walked toward the front door.

     "Where you going, Mr. Bill?" I asked after him, "Shouldn't I call the hospital?"

     "I'm gonna have a cigarette," he said, smiling out one side of his mouth, "Now call my wife."

     I watched the man walk out and sit on the curb in the parking lot while I dialed the number.  When his wife answered, I told him what he said and she said she would be right there.

     She came six minutes later.  Then Bill was gone, too.

Razzle Frazzle Internetz

Okay, seems there's been some problem with the uploading software I use to my hands.  Here's some videos.  Dance monkeys!

Silent Library at Funny or Die!