It was something they could not shelve. It was... Love in the Stacks
Today is new book day. Michelle has been partnered with Enrique to catalog the new items. The computer system has collapsed, causing Carlos to be distracted from his romance with Michelle, a fact that Carlita, the buxom library assistant II, knows only too well.
Enrique grunts as he picks up the large box full of the new Stevie Miller and the Wizard Mother Trucker books. He carries it over to Michelle, who is wrapping the books as Enrique handwrites each record.
“You can talk to me, you know,” Enrique said.
“You think I want to talk to you? You stinky pig! You beautiful bastard!” Michelle stamped each book as she finished a sentence, making Enrique wince.
“Michelle,” he said, “you do not have to take out your hate on the books. Be gentle.”
“To hell with these books,” Michelle said, “And to hell with you.”
Silence as she wiped a tear from her eye.
“Besides, Stevie Miller turns out to be the Shadow in the end, the whole series was a dream, and the talking monkey was his father.”
Enrique gasped, “Michelle! Tell me you did not look?”
“Yes, as I stamped them, I read them, dammit. I know how Stevie Miller dies! At least, in this book, anyway. He always comes back.”
Enrique stood, pacing up and down, “Michelle, this cannot be. This is horrible, you… you are a monster.”
“What the hell?! I just read some dumb book!” Michelle said, standing to face him in the face.
Enrique grasped her shoulders, holding her and looking deep into her greenish eyes, “You have broken the catalog code. You cannot be here. But I don’t want you to go.”
“Plus, if I left,” she said, leaning into him, her hands reaching up to hold his, “this job would take you forever.”
“Yes, well, I-
Just then the door flew open and Carlos entered.
“Enrique! I have fixed the system, turns out it was unplugged the whole - What the hell is going on here?” Carlos asked, his strong jaw jutting out.
“We,” Enrique said, pulling Michelle closer, “are cataloging each other.”
“Where the hell do you come up with this shit?” Michelle asked, slapping away Enrique’s hands.
Before Enrique could speak, Carlita came bursting into the room, “Carlos! Come quickly! There is a fire, hot and sweaty and burning for you.”
“I shall be there in a moment, Carlita!”
“But, sir,” she said, pushing the dark hair off her face, exposing her eyes, one sky blue and one dark green, “We need you to put out this fire with your manly manliness.”
Carlos looked between Carlita and Michelle. Enrique snorted and held up his hands.
“I can put out this fire, Michelle,” Enrique said, and he hurried past Carlita. Carlita stared after him and then followed.
Carlos turned to Michelle, “When I saw his hands on you, I could have killed him.”
“Well,” she said with a smirk playing on her lips, “I would have let you.”
Suddenly an alarm claxon began to sound and water began to pour from the sprinkler system. Carlos moved toward Michelle, arms open, but she moved toward the newly packed books.
“We must protect the books!” Michelle cried.
Carlos stared, enjoying the way the water caused Michelle’s hair to glisten and her pale skin to radiate. He grabbed the nearest box of books and with a grunt threw it under the nearest table. Michelle did the same.
“No room for us under there, I guess,” Carlos said.
Michelle hopped up onto the desk, her hands behind her and her back arched, “Plenty of room on top.”
Before Carlos could go to her, the door opened again and Carlita entered. The water had plastered her clothes to her body like a worn book jacket begging to be ripped off. No curve or line had been left to the imagination. Carlos’s jaw dropped.
“Enrique has caught fire,” Carlita said, running her hands through her midnight hair, pulling the water out even as more streamed down, “and I am all wet.”
She smiled at him as one would a piece of chocolate cake after a board meeting,
From behind Carlos, Michelle’s anger grew. She grabbed the closest heavy object, Stevie Miller and the Wizard Mother Trucker, and threw it at Carlos. It struck him in the head and he fell to the floor.
Carlita shrugged and joined Michelle as they walked out the door.
Is Carlos okay? Why do the girls keep walking out together? What happened with the fire? Is Enrique okay? How are they gonna clean up all that water? Where do I buy Stevie Miller books? Do these people ever meet any patrons?
Find out next time on Love in the Stacks
A Columbia, MO man has been arrested regarding the Friday fire at the University of Missouri Ellis Library. The small fire was kept under control by sprinklers until firefighters could put it out with fire extinguishers. Here's my favorite part: